The Hairline Saga

"There's hair on my pillow, there's hair on my bed.
There's hair everywhere, except on my head!"

I am not a bald guy, and I shall remain so as long as there is a single strand of hair perched on top of my head. By God's grace, I still have enough hair to keep you counting for weeks. This however matters least to people who view the glass half empty. So I end up finding myself at the receiving end of many humor-starved people's comments.

The other day my sister, who stays with her husband in the US, met one of my ex-colleagues. He was glad when my sister told him that I was working in the same company that he worked for earlier. However, he did not seem to recognize me with my name alone, and for confirmation remarked - "OH! the guy who had less hair?". My sister called me up the same night and asked me to start applying Parachute Cocunut oil daily night.

On yet another occassion, I was enjoying snacks and drinks at a party hosted by my previous employer. Holding my glass of fruit juice, I joined a group of senior employees and received the most memorable well-come ever. The guy with the nastiest drink in his hand invited me to join the "bald-club", saying, "Piyush, once you join this club, you will have nothing to loose ever!!". The whole crowd burst into laughter and I attempted to hide my embarrassment by looking at the juice while sipping it. I could however, draw solace from the fact that the guy who commented was actually a full-blown case of perfect phalacrosis.

Another most unforgettable experiance was when one of my friends remarked "Why do you carry the comb now?".

When would my would-de be mine?

I had written the following poem in Feb 2003, a few days before my 27th Birthday. I do not possess any writing skills really. These few lines are just a penned down version of the thoughts that occupied my mind at that time. There was certainly a deliberate attempt to choose words that rhyme and create a humorous tone, though.

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It's been a long wait,
with each passing day, it's getting late.
In a couple of years time,
I would be twenty-nine,
When would my would-be be mine?

Slowly and steadily, the tummy is getting bloated,
And, quite a few well-wishers, have independently noted ..
The thinning hair-line,
And the scalp that's begining to shine,
When would my would-be be mine?

I said to myself, marriages after all, are not rare,
Then why on earth, despair?
And, just as I was begining to feel fine,
I realized that coming up shortly, is yet another lonely Valentine,
When would my would-be be mine.
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My would-be is now mine, i.e., I got married and now going through the regular ordeals of my - "happy married-life".